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Was it a mistake... Awkward 5 kids; 2 angel babies; St Cloud, MN, United States 4642 posts
Nov 2nd '16

... to seperate the boys into there own rooms?
We did some  rearranging last weekend so all three big kids would have their own rooms.
My oldest son loves it, but I am seeing some crazy ocd (not diagnosed) from him now. It is kind of a blessing but it also worries me. His toys each have an exact spot they must go and he always puts them away now. He freaked out on me when I put his clothes away because I folded his t shirts and stuck them in his shirt drawer.... apparently the ones that are not faded need to be hung up and the ones that are fading can go in the drawer but they have to be put in the proper color pile. I also took all the empty hangers out of the drawer and hung them back in the  closet. It seems it is "messy" to have empty hangers just chilling in there.
He makes his bed every morning with his spare blanket and stuffed animals stacked just so. He sweeps his room daily. 
When the boys shared a room he was still a little bit  meticulous about his stuff but the new room seems to be taking it to extremes. I don't know if it is healthy for him to be obsessed with order like he is. 

The other problem is DS 2 hates having his own room. He is lonely and he gets scared. Every morning since we rearranged I have woke up with him in my bed. I asked him about it this morning and he started bawling and said it is scary and lonely to sleep all by himself. He said he would take care of Ds3 even though he doesn't sleep through the night if we would just move him in now. The plan is to move DS3 in with DS2 once Ds3 sleeps through the night. 
It breaks my heart. 
So.... my question is, is it unhealthy to give DS1 his own room if it makes him extremely obessive? 
It is too late to move them back anyway but.......? was it a mistake?

Royal_Lux United States 2660 posts
Nov 2nd '16

No. Your oldest seems to be handling it just fine. The middle child is having a hard time and you feel like fixing it by wishing you didn't separate them? 

Possibly, start getting the baby use to share a room with the middle child now. 

I dont think your oldest with ocd is the concern. The concern is the middle child adjusting. The oldest child being overly neat isn't the issue. I think it's wonderful that he enjoys keep his room tidy. 

Have Heart 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Western, NY, United States 9013 posts
Nov 2nd '16

sounds like your oldest will make his wife happy one day (;

your oldest deserves his own space. i'd ask him what he sants. but sounds like putting DS3 with DS2 may solve the issue. any change takes time to adjust to.

...B... 5 kids; 3 angel babies; .., .., Christmas Island 1314 posts
Nov 2nd '16

Quoting Awkward:
... to seperate the boys into there own rooms?
We did some  rearranging last weekend so all three big kids would have their own rooms.
My oldest son loves it, but I am seeing some crazy ocd (not diagnosed) from him now. It is kind of a blessing but it also worries me. His toys each have an exact spot they must go and he always puts them away now. He freaked out on me when I put his clothes away because I folded his t shirts and stuck them in his shirt drawer.... apparently the ones that are not faded need to be hung up and the ones that are fading can go in the drawer but they have to be put in the proper color pile. I also took all the empty hangers out of the drawer and hung them back in the  closet. It seems it is "messy" to have empty hangers just chilling in there.
He makes his bed every morning with his spare blanket and stuffed animals stacked just so. He sweeps his room daily. 
When the boys shared a room he was still a little bit  meticulous about his stuff but the new room seems to be taking it to extremes. I don't know if it is healthy for him to be obsessed with order like he is. 

The other problem is DS 2 hates having his own room. He is lonely and he gets scared. Every morning since we rearranged I have woke up with him in my bed. I asked him about it this morning and he started bawling and said it is scary and lonely to sleep all by himself. He said he would take care of Ds3 even though he doesn't sleep through the night if we would just move him in now. The plan is to move DS3 in with DS2 once Ds3 sleeps through the night. 
It breaks my heart. 
So.... my question is, is it unhealthy to give DS1 his own room if it makes him extremely obessive? 
It is too late to move them back anyway but.......? was it a mistake?


The extreme obsession with order and cleanliness could just be his reaction to the change. If its only been a week or so theyve been in their own rooms so i would give it more time for them to settle into it before you try something different. But imo its never too late to go back to something that worked before. 

Also, if the ocd like symptoms are not just a reaction to the change, the bright side is they were brought to light possibly earlier than mightve been otherwise noticed in this extreme.