Miscarriage MamaSaid♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Liberty, MO, United States 729 posts
Aug 25th '16

I didn't even know I was pregnant...
I guess that's kind of me still lying to myself... I saw the signs. My b**bs felt bigger, heavier. I was nauseated. The heartburn...peeing often... I just didn't want to acknowledge it, not yet. My baby turns one in October and I didn't want to confront new life just yet. I wasn't embarrassed or ashamed just not ready... but I started to bleed monday. It was dark brown, and lasted til Wednesday. I took a test and it was already faint... the cramps tapered off and I figured it was something to due with the cysts on my ovaries because I was only cramping one side for so long. But the cramps became unbearable Wednesday night, and I started to bleed bright red blood. I didn't want to go to the hospital for them to tell me what I already knew was happening... I don't know how far along I was but I'm pretty sure I passed my baby yesterday... the cramps have gone since I started passing big tissue clots... they're smaller and aren't as many now... I was and still am an emotional wreck. I wasn't ready for this baby but I didn't want to lose them either. My baby deserved to live... this has never happened to me before and I'm at such a loss... I really have no emotional support, how do I do this? How long am I allowed to be sad? How long do I get to miss this life that could have been until someone tells me to get over it already?? 
If you've made it this far thanks... I don't need responses, (unless you want to) I guess I just needed to get it off my chest...

Love Wedge +2 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Waterloo, Ontario 44855 posts
Aug 25th '16

Oh, I'm sorry <3

You are allowed to be as sad as you want for as long as you want. There is no time limit or schedule for grief. 

Something similar happened to me, almost 8 years ago now. I knew I was pregnant, had missed 2 periods, but no HPTs would pick up a line and doctors wouldn't do anything about "a couple missed periods". I was around 12 weeks when I lost it. I am still sad, sometimes everyday. I would have a 7 year old right now. But instead this babe is watching over her (always felt like it was a her) siblings.

If you ever want to talk or rant or cry to someone, please message me. I didn't want a baby at the time either, but it's no less a loss.

.Bubbles. 3 kids; United States 1718 posts
Aug 25th '16

I'm so sorry, hun. <3 You can't put a time limit on grief. You grieve as long as you need to. If you ever need to talk/vent, feel free to PM me. Hugs.

MrsKW 3 kids; United States 4579 posts
Aug 25th '16

I've never had a loss but i will say you should take as much time as you need to grieve. I'm sure you will always wonder what could have been and wish to have your baby here. My parents lost my brother at 30weeks and i occassionally wonder what he would look like or what his personality would have been. Its ok to miss them but also dont let it drag you down too much. I'm sorry for your loss! 

Wouldn'tUlike2know 2 kids; United States 1331 posts
Aug 25th '16

Aw I'm so sorry for your loss <3 <3

Kara ツ 1 child; 1 angel baby; Fort Carson, CO, United States 418 posts
Aug 25th '16

As it's already been said, there's no time limit on how long you can grieve for. We lost our son at 18 weeks in November and I was an emotional wreck for months. Even now, I'm better but I still have days where I can't stop crying. It never goes away, but it becomes easier to handle. Give yourself lots and lots of time and take baby steps. I'm so sorry mama.

Bunni♥+4 4 kids; 5 angel babies; ., IL, United States 4196 posts
Aug 25th '16

I'm sorry for your loss! My first miscarriage, we weren't ready for another baby yet but it still hurt like hell. You can be sad for as long as you need! There's no time limit. 

MamaSaid♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Liberty, MO, United States 729 posts
Aug 26th '16

Thank you all so, so much. All these responses have me in tears. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I really needed this.