Should I pay for relative care?

-Parenting
Should I pay for relative care?

You have settled down with your responsibilities towards your child and enjoyed your motherhood and bonding with your newborn. A period comes in your life, when you might have to place your child under the care of a caregiver who could be your relative for a few hours in order to do your household chores or go out for important work. In case you were working before pregnancy and completed your extended maternity leave, your child needs to be kept with a caregiver who would look after his needs in your absence.

How would you pay your relative?

Your close relative has come forward to help your child in your absence. You are placed in a very sensitive situation where you want to pay your child's caregiver and would want to know how much to pay. Most relatives put the young mother in a dilemma as they refuse to take any sort of payment. They mention that they enjoy taking care of your loved one and mention it is their responsibility to help a family member in need.

As a mother you might be embarrassed about the situation and feel that you are taking due advantage of your relative who is babysitting your child.

How can you compensate the relative otherwise?

If you are determined to help your relative who is babysitting your child, there are various options -

You can buy gift certificates for her in her favorite restaurant. She can enjoy this and eat out with her family.

You can take buy her tickets for a movie that she has been wanting to watch for some time.

You can surprise her by making some dish that she loves to it eat and send a thank you card to her.

You can help to pay any household bill if she allows you too.

You can help her with a household chore once a week.

You must remember that you should be sensitive regarding your feeling towards her and take care not to embarrass her. Your gesture should show that you are appreciating her help and thanking her in your own way. You must not misuse her help and take it for granted. She should given days off when she needs it. You do not need to put anything in contract but some understanding is necessary for both of you.

What sort of arrangement do you need to make?

In case of you have agreed on a payment pattern, be clear on your terms and conditions both would enjoy. You have to pay a salary amount that could be from seven dollars an hour to twenty-five dollars an hour. Keep the following things in mind -

Decide on how she would receive her payment monthly or daily.

Be clear whether you would pay for the holidays that she takes. This would add a professional touch to the agreement.

You need to pay for the extra expenses that your caregiver buys for your kid i.e. toys, baby food etc.

Clearly mention if your child would go to your caregiver's home or would your relative come to your home and baby sit her.

Clearly mention the activities that you want for your child and be strict in monitoring them. Your caregiver should understand that there are certain rules and personal preferences that you want your child to follow.

Transfer knowledge regarding your child's schedules and routines to your care giver. This would help the caregiver a better ability to understand your babies need.

Take time to assess the care that is been given to your child and check if your child is comfortable with the routine. Do not let your family relation strain the professional relationship that you have with our relative who is also your child's care giver. An open communication and mutual respect between the two of you would help your child in the long run.

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