A Tale of Two Fertility Challenged People

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Although at first glance our family seems normal two blonde haired, blue-eyed, precious, healthy boys who are a good mix of their parents,we didn’t take the “normal” route to get here.Statistics show that one in three couples will suffer from infertility and guess what?We were unfortunately that third couple.I was blessed to marry my high school sweetheart when I was 21 and he was 19.Soon after our first anniversary, we decided to start our family.We would soon discover this wouldn’t be as easy as we thought.Six months into our baby making, we discovered we would face known challenges with my hubby’s fertility and possible unknown challenges with mine.My hubby underwent multiple semen analysis’, a varicocele ligation, and more dietary supplements than I can name.I was prescribed the ever popular Clomid and we even tried two attempts at IUI(intrauterine insemination).However, all were unsuccessful.

By this time, my hubby(and I) had decided to get out of the Navy so he could finish his nursing degree.Although he would be in the National Guard and working part time and I would work full time and go to school part time, we would not have the extra funds or insurance coverage to continue medically trying to have a baby and would have to continue trying on our own.

This went over…not so well…we fought, we cried, we even talked about divorce, but in the end we decided that loving each other and being together was ultimately what we wanted.So, we hung in there and waited until he finished school to revisit medical treatment. Consequently, during this time we were contacted by a family member who couldn’t take care of their child anymore and was willing to sign over their parental rights to us.Unfortunately, the baby’s father came back into the picture and refused to sign his rights away.Additionally, a neighbor’s daughter was pregnant for the third time and wanted to put the baby up for adoption and selected us to be the parents.Sadly, she changed her mind and kept the baby.

Needless to say, we again felt kicked in the guts and felt abandoned.Wefelt like we were at rock bottom, but we were soon to discover that we couldfall much further.In October 2006, myhubby’s youngest brother tragically died.How could we come back from that pain?Our whole family felt like we were sinking and I prayed for a baby tobring us some healing.No such luck…yet.

Time marched on and my hubby commissioned into the Army in December 2006 and in the spring of 2007 we moved to our first Army duty station.I started school full time that summer and we decided that God was leading us to adopt a baby through the state. We began taking the classes and preparing our home to welcome a child into it.Although we thought this was what we wanted, the powers that be in this organization continued to cast a negative “energy’ on our journey by finding fault in our requests at what child to place in our home, criticizing our pets,and home over small insignificant items.It was such blatant discrimination to us that others in the class noticed it.

However, we pushed through because we felt like we were doing what God wanted us to do, even though I cried my eyes out after every class. I felt for those children who were unloved and for the roadblocks that family services were throwing in our path to love one of them.My hubby is persistent, if nothing else, sonot only were we pursuing adoption, but he had us on the eighteen month waitlist for the military fertility specialists.Truly neither of us were letting go of the dream to have our ownbiological children.This was such astruggle on my heart.Little did I know the door God was about to open.(continued in Blog 3)

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