I'm Pregnant! A surprise discovery...

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It was 6am on a Thursday morning, still dark outside and I was getting ready for work, as was my husband (although at that point we weren’t yet married – that came a few months later and is for another blog). I had the pregnancy test in the bathroom for 4 days and was effectively in denial about having to take it at all.

I thought I’d wait until the weekend ‘just incase’ but was persuaded to take it that morning. I was displaying every conceivable pregnancy symptom in the book, along with the absence of a period, so the test really was just the confirmation that I wasn’t quite brave enough to face.

There really is nothing dignified about taking a pregnancy test and even though the instructions say it can take up to a minute for the result to appear, ‘3-5 weeks pregnant’ came up on the digital screen almost immediately. I stared at it for a few seconds and even though I’d already told myself that I knew – seeing it in black and white was quite a shock. It was then, in those few seconds that life inextricably changed beyond all recognition.

This pregnancy was a surprise for both of us. We both knew that we would have a family together eventually, but I guess I presumed it would happen in a few years. I work on a freelance basis, usually from home, but it just so happened that this particular morning was the first day of a 5 week contract in the city organising a conference for a company I’d never worked with before. I’m used to first days in the office, you have to be when you work for yourself, but this was a totally different experience. With only a few minutes of the morning to spare before we had to rush off to work – we had no time to talk it over. And with a couple of evenings of work nights booked, it wouldn’t be until the weekend before we could get a real chance to digest the news.

I had already started to feel unwell, a bit dizzy and my breasts felt like they’d done a few rounds in the UFC ring… the last thing I wanted was the stress of starting a new job! The train journey was exhausting. I normally go to the gym 3-4 times a week and consider myself relatively fit and healthy. A morning commute had never taken it out of me like this before! Out of breath, nauseated and clinging to the rail in the packed train was horrendous. By the time I made it to work, it took all my energy to behave like a normal person on their first day of a new project, although I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to being a little distracted.

Those first few weeks were crazy. I had to confess to the guys in the office (who I had only just met) that I was pregnant to justify the strange lunch combos (I ate a LOT of chips) and extended periods of time spent in the bathroom. They found out before our parents! Morning sickness, or as I like to refer to it as ‘around-the- clock-all-consuming-relentless sickness’ really hit me hard. It was like dealing with a really bad, tequila hangover up until 14 weeks, when I miraculously recovered – literally, overnight. It wasn’t really until the 12 week scan that I realised what was really happening and seeing our tiny baby kicking about on the screen was one of the most amazing moments ever. I was going to be a Mummy. Slowly the excitement began to outweigh the nausea and that’s when it started to feel real. We decided to keep it a secret from our friends until we made it to 12 weeks. This was so tough, mainly because I can’t lie and people were raising eyebrows when I’d turn down a glass of wine. Anyone who had their suspicions had kept it to themselves until we made the big reveal with our first scan photo. I look at it almost daily and have it saved as the screen saver on my phone. I just can’t wait to meet our baby.

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