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question for my black mamas. jgnmelissa 3 kids; Middle of Nowhere, IA, United States 2251 posts
May 13th '14

my cousin keeps posting song lyrics on fb that have the word n***a in them. To me is offensive and something he shouldn't be saying even if it is a song. Dh is black and we have 3 kids together and I don't use the word at all. I called him out on it and asked him nicely to stop using it and now his sister is snapping on me saying is song lyrics and its not offensive because there's no -er on the end. I guess to me he has no business using it at all. am I wrong? Is it okay, am I just over reacting or would you also find it offensive??? 

promisesmommy 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Enid, Oklahoma 663 posts
May 13th '14

Delete him then
I bet your husband or his friends say it

Kaitniss Everdeen 3 kids; l, ol, Fiji 38907 posts
May 13th '14

I am a white momma so my opinion may be invalid. Actually, I dont have one. I just never knew it was a big deal? Genuine.

jgnmelissa 3 kids; Middle of Nowhere, IA, United States 2251 posts
May 13th '14

Dh and his friends say it a lot.  I just don't believe that a bunch of redneck hillbillies should be walking around saying it. 

StinkBug 1 child; 1 angel baby; London, UK, United Kingdom 6520 posts
May 13th '14

Haven't seen you around here for ages mama!! Hope everything is going well :)

the word is still the same no matter how is spelt, but I'd just let it go over my head! 

promisesmommy 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Enid, Oklahoma 663 posts
May 13th '14

Quoting jgnmelissa:
Dh and his friends say it a lot.  I just don't believe that a bunch of redneck hillbillies should be walking around saying it. 


What's the difference
your doing the same thing calling them redneck hillbillys..

♡☆º×ß¡±©µ×º☆♡ 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Centralia, Wa, United States 49854 posts
May 13th '14

Quoting jgnmelissa:
Dh and his friends say it a lot.  I just don't believe that a bunch of redneck hillbillies should be walking around saying it. 


So having a double standard is ok? racist much?

Kaitniss Everdeen 3 kids; l, ol, Fiji 38907 posts
May 13th '14

Quoting jgnmelissa:
Dh and his friends say it a lot.  I just don't believe that a bunch of redneck hillbillies should be walking around saying it. 


idk, I usually just hear "n***a" in songs, and different kinds of people tend to just like certain kind of music. I guess thats why I dont see a big deal. Its pretty much just a filler in a song to me whenever I do hear it. 

goatfajitas Due September 16; 3 kids; 1 angel baby; dirty 5 thirty, CA, United States 4013 posts
May 13th '14

Quoting promisesmommy:

What's the difference
your doing the same thing calling them redneck hillbillys..


Exclamation Fer realz on that.
and why can black people say it and not white people?  People are people...it's derogatory no matter who says it.

SuckerPinch 2 kids; the desert, CA, United States 4321 posts
May 14th '14

Quoting jgnmelissa:
Dh and his friends say it a lot.  I just don't believe that a bunch of redneck hillbillies should be walking around saying it. 



really?????
eta: why is it ok for your black husband and friends to say it but not "redneck hillbillies"? Serious double standard right there. And quite hypocritical.

SuckerPinch 2 kids; the desert, CA, United States 4321 posts
May 14th '14

Quoting Sandyfajitas:

Exclamation Fer realz on that.
and why can black people say it and not white people?  People are people...it's derogatory no matter who says it.





seriously!! Apparently only black people can get away with saying that.

Squid Kid Unavailable, NA, United States 32450 posts
May 14th '14

It being okay for one race to say it and one not to is racist. 

It's a word. If you don't like people who speak that way, don't associate with them. 

jgnmelissa 3 kids; Middle of Nowhere, IA, United States 2251 posts
May 14th '14

seeing as how I am related to the "redneck Hill billy" I guess that makes me one as well so yeah, I don't see that as being racist. 

SuckerPinch 2 kids; the desert, CA, United States 4321 posts
May 14th '14

Quoting jgnmelissa:
seeing as how I am related to the "redneck Hill billy" I guess that makes me one as well so yeah, I don't see that as being racist. 



that makes no sense. You can be related to a "redneck hillbilly" or any other race and still be racist. Your basically saying its ok for your husband to say it because he's black. But when this cousin of yours says it in song lyrics its racist???

user banned 1 child; ., ., Afghanistan 14887 posts
May 14th '14

It's part of a song lyric. I don't think it is racist. The person in the song is already saying it, so are they racist? Or does that not count if they are black and singing it? Also maybe delete him off fb if it bothers you?