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16 and pregnant really bad situation... Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

I am really early. I think. I had sex protected it slipped off once. I'm living with a foster family. And the person I was having sex with is a mess. I wasn't supposed to be have sex with him. I don't know a bit of me feels like I don't like it here anyway. But idk I don't really want an abortion. It's why I haven't told anyone. If I don't want an abortion is there a way I can parent? Advice?

❅ ⛄ ❅ ⛄ ❅ ~, OO, United States 76807 posts
Mar 21st '14

Only you can answer if you can parent. Are you willing to make the sacrifices that will be required of you? You should probably contact a foster care worker and ask what happens when a foster kid gets pregnant and what your options are. They may have a home for you.

nov.08mama TTC since Oct 2013; nada, NY, United States 1271 posts
Mar 21st '14

Have you considered an open adoption?

Kadybug's Mommy Due October 30; 1 child; 3 angel babies; Easton, PA, United States 138 posts
Mar 21st '14

Remember abortion isn't your only choice, you can also do adoption.. and that's your choice, just remember if you choose to parent you are the person that has to provide and take care of that child.

Kelly&Coralie 1 child; Rochester, NY, United States 56012 posts
Mar 21st '14

you have 3 choices. Abortion, Adoption, or Keeping it. 

You do need to make a decision fairly soon as the window for abortion closes a bit every day. 

Meditate on it. Tell your foster care providers. Talk to your case worker. Make the best choice for you AND the best choice for the baby, whatever choice that ends up being. 

Good luck with everything

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting ♏ɑkɑnɑni:
Only you can answer if you can parent. Are you willing to make the sacrifices that will be required of you? You should probably contact a foster care worker and ask what happens when a foster kid gets pregnant and what your options are. They may have a home for you.


I'm afraid that my case worker is going to be as negative. 

Everyone's already hard on me. I have had a past with addiction that my foster caregivers or whatever and case worker know about and this would just make things worst.

A part of me feels like running away again. Because I don't want to deal with the reaction, I'm going to get. It's going to be too stressful.

❅ ⛄ ❅ ⛄ ❅ ~, OO, United States 76807 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting Ciara blache:

I'm afraid that my case worker is going to be as negative. 

Everyone's already hard on me. I have had a past with addiction that my foster caregivers or whatever and case worker know about and this would just make things worst.

A part of me feels like running away again. Because I don't want to deal with the reaction, I'm going to get. It's going to be too stressful.


Then adoption may be your best choice. Running away won't make things better. How will you receive medical care? How will you care for a baby on the streets?

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting ♏ɑkɑnɑni:

Then adoption may be your best choice. Running away won't make things better. How will you receive medical care? How will you care for a baby on the streets?


I know it's not a good idea. I just don't like the stress of everything.

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting nov.08mama:
Have you considered an open adoption?


Yeah I wouldn't want my kid to have to be raised by strangers like I am. It's not something I'd want my baby to go through.

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting 2 babies - 1 baby daddy:

Well, you don't have an abortion so that you get to stay in the home. You have an abortion because you aren't ready and able to give a baby the things it needs and deserves. 

You'll have to talk to your social worker about government aid and such, you should talk to him/her anyway because they can line you up with anything you need. You don't need to tell them who you had sex with, say you don't know who the father is. 

Well basically that's why I'd have an abortion to stay here. I know they wouldn't allow me to stay with them while pregnant they already hate me. Think I'm no good anyhow.


I want to talk to my social worker I think when I'm fully decided in what I want to do so you know I'm swayed into doing anything I'm not prepared for and I can handle the stress you know.

RainbowSprinkles 2 kids; United States 2093 posts
Mar 21st '14

Wait, so are you actually pregnant or did you have protected sex,it slipped off once and now you think you MIGHT be pregnant?

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting AutumnEmber'sMommy:
Wait, so are you actually pregnant or did you have protected sex,it slipped off once and now you think you MIGHT be pregnant?


I have a positive pregnancy test and I'm a week late on my period.

Ciara blache Due November 29; United States 142 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting JΔS:

You think you're stressed now, pfft.


I'm stressed about what is to come.

I used to use drugs to get away from my problems and the stress that comes with it.

and I can't do that anymore since I'm pregnant so idk how to deal with it. Handle the stress.

RainbowSprinkles 2 kids; United States 2093 posts
Mar 21st '14

Oh okay, I was confused by your original post. Anyways, this is a huge decision for you to make and obviously you already know that. Definitely not the best situation to be having a child. Are there any places around you that you can go to that can give you advice? Give you info on abortion, adoption and if you decide to keep the baby then where to go from there? I know around where I live there is a Catholic charities place. Have you tried googleing places like that in your area? I don't know where you live or I would have tried to look them up on my own. Talking to someone in person will probably be very helpful. I am sorry this is not easier, and I wish I had the correct answer to give you but in the end it is up to you. Hang in there, no matter what decision you make...try to remember the baby comes first. <3 Good luck. :)

nov.08mama TTC since Oct 2013; nada, NY, United States 1271 posts
Mar 21st '14

Quoting Ciara blache:

Yeah I wouldn't want my kid to have to be raised by strangers like I am. It's not something I'd want my baby to go through.


Aw :-( for the child it would be a complete family from the very first day. People involved in adoption want to provide a solid family environment. You as the birth mom interview families until you feel a special click with a couple. You would get to know this family theoughout your pregnancy. They should feel like part of your family. You can be a part of the child's life! It's possible. It's a very selfless decision but parenthood means doig what is best for the child, regardless of your feelings. You have to do your best.