I was eating a cupcake at work, and icing got on my boxers. Yeah, just heard that excuse on Maury. What's the worst/most out there excuse you've ever heard?
hahaha that's hilariously lame lol
I didn't think I was going to see you today.
Cause that sounds reasonable.
"She kissed me. I didn't want to make a scene so I just went along for a little bit."
<blockquote><b>Quoting redneck mamma:</b>" You were asleep and I was horny, we were watching this anime p**n... ^ Reason my ex used to cheat on me with my "friend""</blockquote>
That's hilarious, not that it happened to you, but anime p**n!!
"Well, I don't know why you decided to go through my messages".
My ex told me he got burnt with a zippo lighter during a party, to explain a mark on his neck.
Real explanation: he had a hickey and knew I was flying to him... so he burnt himself to hide it.
Quoting Kim ♥ 2247517922:" My ex told me he got burnt with a zippo lighter during a party, to explain a mark on his neck. Real explanation: he had a hickey and knew I was flying to him... so he burnt himself to hide it."
What... I can't even... >.<
'It wasn't anything serious or even good really, I just felt like you were neglecting me since you work so much.'
My answer back 'We have sex almost every day you sack of dog shit! I know the real reason, it's because you have so many f**king mommy issues that you crave female attention & no woman wants to be around your sorry ass unless you are willing to f**k them, I've seen the messages dumbass!'
my bf got a text one night i can't remember what it said but it was from a girl and his automatic response was its my sister!! like wtf couldnt u think of a better lie
I'll tell you a real reason for DH finding a condom in our trash can.
When we first got together we lived in a hotel.. I stuck our laundry detergent upon a closet shelf, and when I pulled it down to do laundry, there was a used condom stuck to the bottom of it, so I shook it off into the trash. Well DH had been out of town, he came back to the hotel while I was out doing laundry, and saw the condom in the trash. He flipped out on me, and honestly I never thought twice about that looking suspicious. I was telling the truth, and I'm not sure if he believes me to this day. (That was almost 4 years ago).
Guys are so f**king lame. They have already been caught and they wanna dig an even deeper hole!!
<blockquote><b>Quoting Kacti:</b>" I'll tell you a real reason for DH finding a condom in our trash can. When we first got together we ... [snip!] ... looking suspicious. I was telling the truth, and I'm not sure if he believes me to this day. (That was almost 4 years ago)."</blockquote>
I'm sure things like that DO happen, but think of how rare it must be!
I don't know if I'd believed you. lol
Quoting DeidreLC:" What... I can't even... >.<"
I know, right? He had a band-aid on his neck when I got there and I asked him about it... LIAR. His roommate told me the truth. Of course, his roommate also wanted me to show him my vagina... but after asking my bf about the hickey he confirmed.
You live and you learn... and, no, I didn't show his roommate my vag haha
'She was walking around naked. I didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, so I got naked too and all we did was watch a movie.'
Alrighty then, dumbass...