Nobody should ever be made to feel the way that you are feeling by someone who 'loves' them. If you're not happy leave. Make a better life for you and your children.
From everything you have stated I think it's time for you two to part ways. Living in that emotional state is not healthy for you or your children. That's just a horrible situation all the way around. Is there anyone you and the kids can go stay with until you can get on your feet? Sorry hon!
Quoting mmjohnson13:" I have nowhere to go. My mom's husband has sexually abused me. I do not have a relationship with my dad. ... [snip!] ... would eat up my most likely min wage check. I feel trapped, but i would rather stay and my kids have a roof over their heads..."
Go to a domestic violence shelter! Apply for help from the state(food stamps, Cash assistance, Medicaid, child care) They shelter will help you get on your feet and do things you need to do to better yourself along with your children. There is no excuse to stay and be treated like shit. I've been there. I was beat for 2 years. Like hospital stays internal bleeding beat. I stayed. I thought things would be different. It wasn't it just got worse. I made the greatest decision of my life and left and went into hiding and got things together and was a better person in the end.
Quoting mmjohnson13:" I've thought about that, but it's emotional and i have no proof. He has never been physically abusive ... [snip!] ... says domestic violence...I'm not afraid he will hurt me or the kids, i just don't have anything or anywhere to go if i leave."
You don't need proof. Emotional and verbal are still forms of abuse.