Quoting MunchkinWrangler:" Yeah I had a molar pregnancy and the fetus died off around 7-8 weeks. I had a D&C at 11 weeks and ... [snip!] ... as if they were saying it was a choice I had made... like I was aborting my fetus on purpose. You know? Ugh it was obnoxious. "
Exactly. It has such a salty undertone.
I don't mind people asking questions about it, I just don't appreciate when the questions end up being a whole different conversation smack dab in the middle of one we were already having. Or when the conversation is 90% the other person talking about something I don't want to discuss, and the only way to avoid this discussion is to omit my late child who I want to include (because she is part of me and my family). I hate having to 'disrespect' my child by purposely excluding her from my answer just to avoid a conversation that may be uncomfortable for someone else.
Yes, I'm hurting. Yes, time will heal me. Although, when I'm 'healed' I'm sure these same conversations will still be happening and I'll still be getting annoyed at them lol
Quoting Vindictive:" Exactly. It has such a salty undertone."
I agree. When I think of an abortion I think of someone choosing to terminate a pregnancy. I always just refer to it as a D&C... not an abortion. Although, sometimes I worry when it's brought up mentioning I have had a D&C because I don't want people to think I aborted by choice because I had a baby less than a year after.
Quoting Lyssa Ashley:" I don't mind people asking questions about it, I just don't appreciate when the questions end up being ... [snip!] ... when I'm 'healed' I'm sure these same conversations will still be happening and I'll still be getting annoyed at them lol"
Then just tell them you don't want to talk about it!
If you choose to include your miscarriage as one of your children they are going to ask why you only have one here with you. It's only natural. If you don't want them to ask, don't mention it. If you do, and you think it's disrespectful not to include them, than you need to have the balls to stop the conversation if it starts going out of line.
I'm not sure what else you want anyone to tell you!?
For me it is like the question "So don't have any kids?"
Most of the time I'll say yes but she isn't here then the conversation stalls and I say something about the silence to get a laugh.
Quoting Vindictive:" Yep. Just like a spontaneous abortion. The word abortion stings, even though that's technically what its called. Kwim?"
I've never had a MC but the Dr. is calling this pregnancy a threatened abortion and I can't stand the word.