Quoting MommaNoodle:" me either. if it was me, whether it was drunk driving or leaving my kid in the tub, i would WANT to ... [snip!] ... i would feel terrible my whole life, yes, but i would want to be held accountable for the absolutely dumb thing that i did. "
If I caused the death of a child, whether mine or not, I would probably end up harming myself or worse if I weren't convicted.
As sad as that mother probably is and as much as I don't think she would be a danger to anyone else, I think she should be charged and punished. She was negligent, plain and simple and it resulted in the death of her child.
I don't normally promote harshly punishing people with prison sentences when they are not a danger to society, however, sometimes examples need to be set to prevent future tragedies. Sadly, there is not a test that has to be passed to become a parent, therefore, some people with zero common sense can parent children. Maybe some of these parents who have no foresight to see that leaving a baby in a bathtub alone is dangerous, might be able to understand that THEY would be punished for doing something so stupid if they see that this woman was held responsible and punished. Maybe, if they are dumb enough to leave a baby in a bathtub, this would make them think twice about doing so. Sometimes we just need to make examples out of people to prevent other tragedies from happening and if making an example out of this woman could prevent the death of even ONE child, it's worth it to me.
I feel uncomfortable leaving my 4 year old while I get a towel or clothes, even with the doors open while I'm talking to her, I couldn't imagine leaving a 1 year old!
That is horribly sad. I agree that there is no punishment that will be as terrible as the guilt she will be left with, however, she is at fault and should be punished.
I agree that she should be charged, but according to the article she wasn't. I honestly don't see how. She didn't accidentally leave her baby alone in the tub, she negligently decided something else was more important than the safety of her barely 1 year old. It's just so sad.
Quoting Thisperyears:" If I caused the death of a child, whether mine or not, I would probably end up harming myself or worse if I weren't convicted."
Same here. If something happened to my son, I don't think I'd ever recover.
I live on the water, so I have been OCD about teaching him how to swim the moment he popped out of the womb since most drowning deaths are 0-5 year olds.
<blockquote><b>Quoting IDID-VBAC 12/09:</b>" Parent is to blame. I dont even leave my (almost) 5yr old and 3yr old alone-not even to walk 4 feet around the corner to grab a towel. "</blockquote>
Ditto! Mine are the same age and I never walk away. I got so pissed at my husband when he did it once. It's really sad how much this happens. I agree mom should be charged with something...but definitely not murder.
<blockquote><b>Quoting тᴀỵ 26:</b>" I was reading a story about the death of a 13 month old. Apparently the LO was in the bath and the parent ... [snip!] ... away. Is the parent at fault or is it purely an 'accident'? Should the parent be charged, if so, what should the charge be?"</blockquote>
When a parent does something reckless like the woman in question did , hell yes she should be charged!
To me, an accident would be your child yanking his hand out of yours and running into the street. But when a caregiver causes a child's death by breaking a safety-rule or being negligent like this, it's a slap in the face to all parents who do everything they can to keep their children safe and still lose them.
I really don't believe in "suffered enough" when it comes to cases described by the OP.
<blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" No IMO she should not be charged. It's a terrible tragedy and it could have been prevented. I'm sure ... [snip!] ... make potentially fatal mistakes all the time. Would you prosecute a mother who didn't anchor her child's dresser to the wall?"</blockquote>
I read that post. The three-year-old's dresser fell on her in the middle of the night. No one was awake to hear and save her. That wasn't the case of a mother putting her kid in the bath and getting on Facebook or dangling him over a pit of wild animals, because her daughter wasn't placed in danger. She was safe in bed when her parents left her room.
That's an accident. And I'm glad I read it because I didn't even think toddler-furniture could be that heavy.
Listen. Everyone seems to be horrified by my opinion. My opinion is based on the fact that I don't believe that our judicial system should be a punishment based program, I think it should be more about keeping the public and their property safe and rehabilitating criminals who have the ability to be rehabilitated. I don't think a mother who made an unarguably STUPID decision to leave very young child in the tub and go do something completely unnecessary is a danger to the public (or anyone else at all) and I dont think there is any way to rehabilitate her. If it were me (although I've never done anything even close to as stupid as this) I would not survive the grief and guilt I felt. I KNOW for a fact that I would end up killing myself. What could possibly be worse than losing a child and having it be 100% your fault?? Nothing. Drinking and driving is not the same as this situation at all IMO. And I personally think that anchoring your chukdren's large furniture to the wall is just as much of a common sense safety rule as never leaving your child alone in the tub.
I don't think that she's getting off Scott free wether she is prosecuted or not. JMO
Quoting MommaSav2:" Listen. Everyone seems to be horrified by my opinion. My opinion is based on the fact that I don't believe ... [snip!] ... leaving your child alone in the tub. I don't think that she's getting off Scott free wether she is prosecuted or not. JMO"
I actually very much agree with you about prison being reserved for those who are a danger to the public.....in MOST cases.
However, like I stated in my original response to this topic, I also believe that unfortunately sometimes examples need to be set in the hopes of preventing other tragedies like this from happening. For some people, hearing this story and the death of the child alone isn't enough to make them think before they make similarly stupid decisions. The thought that they could face criminal charges and a prison sentence, however, may be a scary enough thought for them to make them think twice about being so stupid. As selfish as that may be, people like that do exist. For whatever reason, the possibility of THEM getting in trouble and facing punishment would be more of a motivating factor than the potential harm to their child. Sometimes the only reason people don't commit crimes or neglect/abuse their kids is out of fear of being held criminally responsible. If making an example out of this woman and giving her a prison sentence can prevent the death of even ONE child, then it's worth it.
That isn't the only reason or even the main reason I believe she should be criminally charged, but it's certainly one of my reasons. The bottom line is, she is responsible for the death of her child. It was completely preventable. Yes, she is probably grieving terribly and she is likely not someone who will continue to make dangerous and/or reckless parenting decisions, but we can't know that for sure. Not to mention, if we just let people off free and clear after doing something they KNEW was incredibly dangerous (like leaving a baby in a tub of water unattended) resulting in the death of the child, it would really set a dangerous precedence. Say someone really despises their child and wants to kill them (seems far fetched, but it happens), knowing that this girl faced zero charges and was not held responsible in any way by our justice system, could give them the idea that they could drown their child in a bathtub and make it look like an accident. Especially with an infant who probably wouldn't be able to struggle enough to cause any kind of defensive wounds, this cold blooded murderer could be completely off the hook due to the precedence set by the justice system who did not hold the mother, whose child drowned in the accident, responsible for her neglectful actions.
The only time I leave my 2 year old alone in the bathtub is when I walk 5 steps to get a towel. Leaving the room when a toddler is in the bath is negligence.
<blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Jas ♥:</b>" Not the same."</blockquote> Ok. But ... [snip!] ... is going to live wih for the rest of her life. I think that's enough and she doesn't need to be prosecuted in my opinion."</blockquote>
I don't think feeling guilty is a good enough reason to avoid being prosecuted. A lot of people go to jail for causing death and at least a handful of them must feel nothing but regret and self-loathing for what they've done. Why should this woman be any different?
<blockquote><b>Quoting Thisperyears:</b>" If I caused the death of a child, whether mine or not, I would probably end up harming myself or worse if I weren't convicted."</blockquote>
This. I could NOT live with that.
<blockquote><b>Quoting Jas ♥:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" Listen. Everyone seems to be horrified by my ... [snip!] ... anchoring your children's furniture to the wall is common sense. I actually hadn't heard of doing that until about 3 years ago."</blockquote>
Me either. I had always assumed that furniture made for toddlers/ toddler's rooms was built too light to cause serious injury. Glad I know differently now.
Quoting Jas ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" Listen. Everyone seems to be horrified by my ... [snip!] ... anchoring your children's furniture to the wall is common sense. I actually hadn't heard of doing that until about 3 years ago."
I don't think it's a common sense thing either. You don't automatically associate a dresser in a kid's room with a strong possibility of tragedy. Pretty much anyone with a brain will associate a young child/infant/toddler left alone in water with potential drowning.