Hi. My name is Nicole and I turned 18 on August 5th. I just recently found out that I am pregnant after going to my yearly check up at the gyno this past Thursday. I do not know exactly how far along I am, but I do know that I am early and can be anywhere from 3-7 weeks. I have my first ultra sound on Tuesday. So far, I've been pressured by the people around me to get an abortion. This last week I've had horrible dreams, have been breaking down crying practically everyday going back and forth from these two options that lay in front of me. I just don't think that I could ever do such a thing. I am still with my boyfriend, we've been happily together for almost 3 years. He is scared, and also mentioned our other option but he also made it very clear that no matter what it is my decision and he will support me either way. That's all i've been hearing lately from everyone...Are they just wanting to me to give in to their expectations? Will they be disappointed when I decide to have my child? I know it's not going to be easy, but if everyone says they will support me no matter what, that makes me feel alot better. Although they know that I could make another choice. I am just afraid of disappointing them, but I have a feeling once everyone around me knows that I am pregnant and everyone accepts that, stress will be relieved. I know that my boyfriend will get much more excited as the time goes on, I just hope that after 3 years of eachother this will not come between us because as of right now if he could have gone back and been more careful, he probably would. We both have jobs that pay good money and we are both going to school, I just want to know I can give this child an amazing life. I just dont even know the first thing about being a parent and I am scared. I'm so happy I found this website so I can hopefully talk to others in the same situation. it's nice just nice to be able to type and type and type, reach out to others, and know I will not be judged. Any help, suggestions, or advice?
Dont let anyone pressure you into something you could regret forever. Your 18, did you graduate High School yet?
Conrgatulations on your pregnacy.
Don't let ANYONE make the decision about what you do with your child.
Good luck, do what you feel is right.
Sweetheart, NONE of us know anything about being a parent until we've been there. We all learn as we go, so don't let that deter you. You sound like a bright girl and a person that has decent sense so do what you feel is best for you. If you want to keep your baby do it. You'll be almost finished with school by the time baby is here so hopefully you can graduate right on time :) Even if you want to continue and go to college you'll have the summer off, baby will be a few months old and you could even take online classes for your first year. You can get financial aid to help with college and child care even. You CAN do it if you want to! :)
Thank you so much, I've been reading online about abortions these last few days and it seems as if many people regret their decision. I feel as if I could be a great mom and I know that I would be giving up alot of the things girls my age do (partying and what not), for some reason I feel completely okay with that. Having a boyfriend for so long at such a young age you don't really go out much anyways!
Yes, I graduated Highschool in June and my boyfriend and I are both attending the same college. It is his sophomore year and my freshman year.
If you think you can take care of a child then keep it don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you may or may not want to do. A good idea would be a pro and con listen of each option and deal with it that way or just think about what you would like to do because everyone is scared when they find out their pregnant especially for the first time so your nerves may be what is making you so ify on everything. Just think really hard before making a decision and don't stress too much its bad on you and the baby. Congrats on the pregnancy! Hope you make the right decision for you and your baby I know its going to be a hard decision to make!
I think there is a lot of propaganda online about abortions though, TBH. Most people I know that had abortions do not regret it at all.
Don't do it though, unless you're 100% sure it's what you want to do. I got pregnant at 18 & had my son @ 19. I wish I could have waited at least another few yrs, so there is that... but it all worked out for me in the end. Nobody pressured me to get an abortion though :? That's messed up
Wow I can honestly say that I am so happy I found out about this website, because you all are already making me feel so much better. Of course it is a hard decision, but I feel as if I know what the right one is. I shouldn't let people try to talk me out of this any longer, and you are right...it is messed up. I'm just excited for others to adjust and be excited with me.
<blockquote><b>Quoting Nicole Loach:</b>" Wow I can honestly say that I am so happy I found out about this website, because you all are already ... [snip!] ... me out of this any longer, and you are right...it is messed up. I'm just excited for others to adjust and be excited with me. "</blockquote>
It will be hard for the people to get use to, but they will come around, if you ever need anyone to talk to you can PM me.
Good luck :)
Just know that you're making the right decision as long as its a decision that you made and are sure about!
My son wasn't planned and he is the best thing that ever happened to me, you don't know what love is until you look into your child's eyes.
No mum will yell you they knew everything when they had their child, its a steep learning curve and you learn new thongs everyday.
Please make sure you don't let anyone pressure you!
Thank you, I will :) and thanks for the advice Becky!
Good luck and congrats!
dont worry about dissapointing anyone but yourself.
I was in the same situation as you when I was 19. I was with my boyfriend for about a year and half, and I got pregnant. We both wanted to keep it but our families were totally against it, and kept pressuring me into having an abortion. Well, I made the mistake of listening to them and got one. It was one of the hardest things I ever did, because I simply didn't want to do it. Do NOT let anyone pressure you into doing something you know you will regret in the long run. Good luck!
I had the same problem with everyone when i first got pregnant. They were rooting for abortion. I was scared and had never thought of being a parent myself so i gave abortion some thought. BUT i couldnt do it, the longer i was pregnant, the more i got used to the idea of becoming a parent. Give yourself some time to see how you feel before you make a huge decision like abortion. and if you still feel you arent ready, you do what makes you happy. But really allow yourself to be pregnant for a little longer and see how you feel about it then. I believe woman should be able to choose if they want abortion. Allthough i wouldnt ever get one for me. It can mess your chances of having more kids later. Also its not an easy thing to do, Its a little life in there, and you never realise it until you see the ultrasounds. whatever you do you will be ok. Goodluck :) If you keep the baby, i think youll do great as well, besides, WHAT parent is ever ready? my mom had me at 16. You sort of just learn and transition into being a parent. Your family will get over it and they will love that little baby. My family told my mom too abort me because she was 16... She went to do it and saw ultrasound and just couldnt. Everybody loves me so much now and are glad i wasnt aborted.