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Amanda A. 96 kids; South Carolina 35 posts
Jan 18th '12
Quoting Mommyof4NYS:" "

I would have to say adoption is probably one of the hardest decisions a bio family has to make. Its also the least selfish. Why keep a child simply because they are biologically related if you are not prepared to care for them or, they dont 'fit your lifestyle' or whatever other reason there is to be a half-ass parent by just keeping them vs. allowing them to be loved by a wonderful forever family who would otherwise not have the opportunity to be parents. I think God blesses parents with children for reasons -- some of the reasons are simply to allow women who are fertile to offer the gift of life for another woman who cant do the same. Its one of the greatest things and biggest blessings. Im adopted and I thank God I am, everyday.

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
Feb 8th '12

I was adopted at birth. When I turned 18, I met my biological siblings (from my birth mom) and my birth father. I'm really close with my siblings now, it's great. I'm close with my birth father too, he actually took me to Ireland 2 years ago. I decided not to meet my birth mom because my siblings told me that she was an awful person, ect. I feel terrible because she really wanted to meet me, and I am so thankful that she made the decision to give me up for adoption. She died last year, I have a lot of guilt for not meeting her.

Lexi-Avery-Dylan-Gabe 4 kids; Evansville, Indiana 2218 posts
Feb 8th '12
Quoting Ashley..:" I was adopted at birth. When I turned 18, I met my biological siblings (from my birth mom) and my birth ... [snip!] ... thankful that she made the decision to give me up for adoption. She died last year, I have a lot of guilt for not meeting her."

Sorry that you never got the opportunity to meet her :( I have reunited with my b-mom and we have had our differences, but all in all I'm glad I met her! My half sister (from b-mom) is 21 and has 3 children already so my b-mom spends a lot of time helping her b/c her husband doesn't do what he should. I am grateful that my b-mom gave me up as she was 14 when she gave birth to me. Her mother died almost 2 years ago and I wish I would have gotten to meet her b/c she always wondered what happened to me. Anywho, welcome :)

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
Feb 8th '12
Quoting Lexi-Avery-Dylan-Gabe:" Sorry that you never got the opportunity to meet her :( I have reunited with my b-mom and we have had ... [snip!] ... almost 2 years ago and I wish I would have gotten to meet her b/c she always wondered what happened to me. Anywho, welcome :)"

Thank you! Well I'm glad that you met her, it sounds like it's been a great experience!

Lexi-Avery-Dylan-Gabe 4 kids; Evansville, Indiana 2218 posts
Feb 8th '12
Quoting Ashley..:" Thank you! Well I'm glad that you met her, it sounds like it's been a great experience!"

It hasn't been perfect, but hey, what in life is? :)

CLC Due October 15; TTC since Jul 2009; 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Nebraska 1741 posts
Feb 8th '12

For all you ladies that were adopted. In your opinion when is the best time to tell a child they are adopted or tell them about their birthparents. I am adopting soon.

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
Feb 9th '12
Quoting CLC:" For all you ladies that were adopted. In your opinion when is the best time to tell a child they are adopted or tell them about their birthparents. I am adopting soon."

I grew up always knowing that I was adopted, and I definitely think that's the way to do it. It was never a secret, there was never a big dramatic moment of being told "you were adopted, I just always knew and I never had a problem with it. I was always curious about my birthparents but I never once thought "why didn't they want me?" because my parents made me feel so loved.

Lexi-Avery-Dylan-Gabe 4 kids; Evansville, Indiana 2218 posts
Feb 9th '12
Quoting CLC:" For all you ladies that were adopted. In your opinion when is the best time to tell a child they are adopted or tell them about their birthparents. I am adopting soon."

My parents started telling me when I was about 5-6. They just explained it in simple terms that I could understand. I remember them telling me that they couldn't have kids and wanted one so bad and waited so long and were so lucky to have finally gotten me. They also explained that my b-mom was so young and just couldn't take care of me and wanted me to have a better life.

BuggyBoo 2 kids; Pennsylvania 1047 posts
Feb 25th '12

I was adopted at age 2 by my Grandparents. I did not actually know I was adopted until I was 14. Which was actually a bad idea on their part to keep it so hush hush but as an adult I understand why. My real Mother, their daughter, who weirdly enough I never met until a couple years ago, is like a spitting image of the same mind of Casey Anthony so the chances of me living a good life or living at all with my bio Mom would not have been good. I am glad I was adopted. I had a very happy childhood.

Brandy Marie 1 child; Hayward, California 3448 posts
Feb 25th '12
Quoting BuggyBoo:" I was adopted at age 2 by my Grandparents. I did not actually know I was adopted until I was 14. Which ... [snip!] ... a good life or living at all with my bio Mom would not have been good. I am glad I was adopted. I had a very happy childhood."


My parents are actually adoption my son.
I'm glad you feel like you had a great life being raised by them, because I know my son will have a better life with them.

BuggyBoo 2 kids; Pennsylvania 1047 posts
Feb 25th '12
Quoting Brandy Marie:" My parents are actually adoption my son. I'm glad you feel like you had a great life being raised by them, because I know my son will have a better life with them."


Ya, I loved my life, and was very happy and spoiled. My Mom passed back in '06 and I met my real Mom in the winter of '10. When she put me up for adoption to her parents she left town to have her party years and then just got into a lot of shit, became a drug addict and drunk...all kinds of crazy shit. I finally felt I was able to meet her and she came to stay with me for awhile, which ended up being a really bad move. She was a psycho and I appreciated my childhood even more through meeting her. I also took up a relationship with my bio Dad when I had my daughter back in '08. I actually still have a great relationship with him to this day. It is nice to have him in my life, but still very happy with the childhood I had.
You will not be disappointed. If you are close with your parents than you will still be in their lives and be able to watch them grow, which I think would be nice. Good luck.

Brandy Marie 1 child; Hayward, California 3448 posts
Feb 25th '12
Quoting BuggyBoo:" Ya, I loved my life, and was very happy and spoiled. My Mom passed back in '06 and I met my real Mom ... [snip!] ... with your parents than you will still be in their lives and be able to watch them grow, which I think would be nice. Good luck."


Thank you.
He will know who I am, we already decided that.
And I can see him anytime I want.
I'm just thankful that I have such amazing parents.

-Ashley Nicole Due October 17 (boy); 2 kids; Clinton, Indiana 553 posts
Mar 2nd '12
Quoting Ashley..:" I grew up always knowing that I was adopted, and I definitely think that's the way to do it. It was never ... [snip!] ... curious about my birthparents but I never once thought "why didn't they want me?" because my parents made me feel so loved."


:!: I agree with never keeping it a secret, although I don't have the same "loving" experience..

BuggyBoo 2 kids; Pennsylvania 1047 posts
Mar 2nd '12
Quoting -Ashley Nicole:" :!: I agree with never keeping it a secret, although I don't have the same "loving" experience.."


Ya, I don't agree with it either. I was never told I was adopted and I found out on my own at 14, and I flipped out. It was not a good way to find out. I would have liked to have known. I understand why they did what they did but I would have liked to have found out earlier and in a better way. I loved my adoptive childhood and woouldn't trade it for the world, but I agree that honesty is the key in this situation.

CottonCandyVodka Due September 26 (girl); 2 kids; Louisiana 157 posts
Mar 23rd '12

Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander a 4 month old well I'm pregnant with another babygirl due in September so my last daughter and this lil girl will be 9 months and a few weeks apart well anyways my SO wanted me to give it up.for adoption and my cousin that has three boys and gotten fixed really wants a lil girl badly and she wants my baby but I'm not sure if that would be fair to my daughters... I mean if I give her up I know she'll have a good life and stuff but she'll never have her sisters and I would see her all the time.. I am 24 yrs old I know I could take care of them and I could raise them together.. I'm just wondering how some of you that are adopted and ur siblings are not how does that make you feel? I'm most positive I will keep my babygirl with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?